Sept 6 2014
( barely proof read, apologies in advance)
I’m pretty new at this blogging thing. I’m sure somehow it’s evident. So this is “early morning depressive can’t sleep thoughts.” I am up and I’m unable to sleep. I typically don’t have a huge problem with sleep. Well lately I haven’t. They say I suffer from manic depression and anxiety. Since I was 16 I believe. I’m 26 now. And I think sometimes, how can you not be excited, depressed and scared of this world? I have a way of disregarding things. So it was no big deal being called a Manic depressive until the day I realized I was one. I sometimes feel like we our all a bit manic depressive … With varying degrees. But when u feel the depression. And maybe I’ll get into the mania part another time but for now I can only explain what I feel now… It hurts. It hurts so much that’s it’s indescribable … And I don’t know why … Oh the burn lol ( is what I’m calling it now )…. The good news. Not every day or every night feels like this … But when it does … I have absolutely no idea what to do with myself. I just wait it out. Whoever else suffers from manic depression, depression, anxiety … (It’s a shitload of us.) when you’re depressed and feel alone ( like I do now) it helps to know we’re not the only ones.